Striving towards a brave heart-random thoughts on | |
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wcfgggg! 等级 0 楼 发表于 2005/7/25 22:47:41 编 辑 |
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Striving towards a brave heart-random thoughts on a blue day Several days ago, as my former classmates were busy getting registered for our graduate school, I felt an impulse of mixed feelings--a bit out of place and deserted. It lasted only a little while , though, and I recognized I was not sensibel thinking that way, as I still have a lot of friends here, who have been offering me tender & consideration just as much as , if not more than before. I should precisely address myself as USTC alumni now, rather than USTCer as I used to just two months ago. I still stay in lab all day, eat in USTC canteens, work out on USTC sports venues........ The delicate difference between them has brought me not only trouble, but also spiritual torture. My painful experience yesterday proved to me again how fortunate it is to be a registered student, and how helpless a deserted child is. Boble, my lab partner and good friend, left with me an encouragement: Just Do What you Wanna Do, never care how other people treat U, which had also supported him spiritually all through the past several month, and which I have indeed been bearing in mind. However, I am well aware that deeper inside, I not nearly brave enough as they compliment. I have never encountered any person with such inhumanity and cruelty in my life before, let alone a female postgraduate student in one of the most prestigious universities of our country. Have got no idea how she manages to live a world where she does not trust anyone, does not have mercy for anyone, does not care for anyone, hurts everyone, and live a life in uttermost solitude, with no friendship or love. As a matter of fact, my friend had asked me to get prepared dealing with a difficult person, while I have always been confident of getting along with others and firmly believe that love can change difficult people, I googled through the web for experience coping with such persons, with great ambition and earnest. Oh, lord, Had I expected such incredible behavior, I would not have bothered. Somehow I feel a bit of pity for the girl--"she must be in a state of great pressure, I did not want to pain her with more pressure, therefore hanged off the phone indicating my indignation" said my big friend Tiger, who has been contacting all aquaintances possible to help me, and to whom I owe greatest gratitude. Unfortunately, no one seems to be able to help her out of such inhumanity. Perhaps God will some day save her from her sin. Well, I am afraid I have got a long way to go, towards my long cherised brave heart, since I could not help sharing these mixed feelings. And, reminded of what boble once taught me about sharing: "It is cruel to bother your friends with your sorrows and pains in life." , I feel guilty putting all these words down on this board. |
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